Given that pain itself has a variety of types and degrees, this one is a little beyond my comprehension at least. It just pushes you down, pins you down till you can just not breathe anymore. It appears out of nowhere and just grabs at your throat, closing it down.
What is it? What went wrong? – you ask yourself, knowing that there won’t be an answer, because your brain decided to take a back seat and just go blank the moment there was pain.
You ask yourself again, what am I doing here? What needs to be done? Just remind me…who am I?
You start numbing down further and somehow, just when you least expected, it starts giving you a high. You kind of feel like something is shooting straight from your toes up to your head. It feels like a particle..a glowing shapeless structure that goes through every part of your body and somehow shows you that pain is delicious.
It stops mattering that you have no clue who you are etc. etc. you hardly care any more. The heady sensation that it hurts so much that it blinds out every other semblance of a thought.
Pain…I want to get rid of it and I don’t. I know I can’t find a better drug..ever in my life.
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